Child-ish/less Insights (originally written last Jan. 15)

    I really thought that this day would turn out to be just an ORDINARY day.Ordinary day for me means doing the Saturday routine I am accustomed to- waking up before 7:00 a.m and preparing myself for a half-day class in CALL. Well, today turned out to be different than I expected it to be. I was about to prepare myself to school but apart of my morning syndrome( sitting, thinking,staring blankly at the wall, killing the precious time) got the worst in me. I felt like not going to school for no valid reason. My class supposedly starts at 8:00 a.m. but half past 8, I still see myself not compelled to move.With this, I accepted the fact that I will not be going to school, for  I am overwhelmed by my heart's message, whether it's logical or not. To make the story short, I did not go to school. Period.
     At 9 o'clock, I saw my mother hurriedly taking a bath and urging me to join her in the procession.Thoughts were raging through me when she said 'procession' and I've realized that today is the Feast of Sto. Nino. And so with a short notice, I pushed all my energy buttons, I swiftly changed clothes,cleaned my face and ate a couple of toasted bread for breakfast and off we went.Our arrival to church was so untimely, the mass was almost through and I thought I missed the point of being there-in a celebratory mood yet not-so-meaning-filled. I just took pleasure upon seeing various faces of NINOs, wearing colorful costumes with intricate designs, looking as if a real child. I don't know what my initial reaction would be like-  would it be amazement or disgust, but truth to be told, I was amazed seeing a statue of Nino as a king, finely adorned with a royalty suit, as a prince, embellished with a nice golden robe, and as an ordinary child clothed with humility, joy and meekness. I was also stunned and appalled upon seeing statues of Nino dressed like a PNP (with small gun tucked on the side of the pseudo-uniform) , a PMAer with a name plate, a Chef with a ' proud name', a Fortune Teller, overly-decorated and multi-colored linens and so many more. It's a wonder to see how devotees express their devotion to the Child Jesus but sometimes, forgetting the essence and the heart of the celebration. Well that picture bothered me for awhile but I was deeply moved by the number of people who joined the procession. I felt the intense eagerness and passion to sustain an hour of sun-drenched walking in the soil of Tagum. It was a totally humid day and the intensity of  the sun's heat hovering our heads didn't stop the pile of people from joining the flock. I felt the celebration by the unabated shouts of 'Pit Senyor' by the procession goers. I saw a handful of children in festive mood never minding the heat and  the distance to be covered all throughout the procession.I truly felt the air of such a 'feast' and so I personally enjoyed the entire 'walking experience', feeling the heat and pain, tasting my dried mouth,and the longing for water to relieve my thirst. 
            Finally, we reached the church and we've finished the procession. After reaching the place, devotees started dancing and shouting, I was even moved to dance not minding about what other people would think of me. I joined the beat of the music that says 'Ihatag ang kinabuhi sa Ginoo'. I was almost moved to tears upon feeling the heart of the celebration which is honoring the CHILD JESUS in my heart who is just after of pleasing the FATHER. I danced not to the tone of the external music but to the beatings of my heart. I felt like dancing with the rest of the people while holding the statue of Nino in both hands. But suddenly the celebration was spoiled when people suddenly got the flowers from the altar of the Statue of Sto. Nino outside the church where the celebration was held. Then, an angry voice caught the attention of almost all who danced, angry as she was, she announced (not in exact words but in thoughts, it goes)'Pagsayaw sayaw lang mo dinha pero ayaw ninyo kuhaa ang bulak kay 3,500 na tanan. Alas diyes nami sa gabii natulog para pag prepare ana, ayaw ninyo kuhaa. Asa naman inyo batasan? Unsaon na lang na ug matan-awan sa ato mga bisita nga wala na ang mga bulak). These words spoiled the momentum. The devotees stopped dancing, went to different sides of the church, and lost interest-no more dancing, no more celebration.
      Then, I tried to feel what I felt at that moment. It could have been more celebratory had it not for the old woman burst into anger, informing everyone of what she's done to prepare the flowers and all but eventually, spoiled what should have been celebrated. I felt frustrated. Honestly, I felt bad for the woman. But maybe she has just to be forgiven for she was strongly carried by her emotions.
      Now, what's my point of writing about this feast of Sto. Nino and the saga of an angry-old-woman. For one, we should not be too consumed with the external preparations. Before the feast, we should take time to reflect on the essence of celebrating it. Another is, we should think of the the 'ONE' we pay tribute for, just like in today's case, Sto. Nino. It is a feast portraying the child Jesus calling us to revisit the 'child' in our hearts. That amidst the noisy and confused world, we will have a heart like that of a child. For it is only through having the ways of a child that we can inherit the kingdom of God. We are reminded by that gospel every now and then. In whatever circumstance, we should maintain that 'child-like' disposition. Staying happy, living with no worries, delighting in the ways of the Lord, and smiling in every little splendor of life. We may have bundles of flowers, perfect arrangement and all other intricacies in a celebration but we missed the point when we don't EXPERIENCE the CELEBRATION of a TRUE FEAST prepared by the Lord.
      After all, God knows all our flaws and imperfections. What's important is to clothe ourselves with humility that we, too, like a child can see things beyond the flaws and imperfections of others, much more of ourselves.
     Well, I should have used the word "I" instead of 'we'. Nevertheless, it is my greatest reflection today-to be humble and to take the disposition of a child in whatever circumstance in life I would be facing each day. More often than not, I was also like the angry-old-woman, but the challenge is to see things in a different perspective. From now on, I will take the robe of the Child Jesus in dealing with life- not to be so hard, not to be so stern, not to be so stiff, not to be so righteous as if I'm perfect, but the call is simply to be a CHILD. A child with no hang ups, with no worries, with no regrets. A child who's willing to forgive, who's willing to obey, and who's willing to TRUST over and above.A child who's always happy and cheerful despite uncomfortable circumstances, who's always loving and sweet, who's nature is always to be good and do good. I pray I could be like a CHILD, bear the heart of a child and live each day with a loving trust to the Heavenly Father.